Tilda Nell arrived on July 10th after a long labour. She had been ready to come for some time prior to this; around two weeks before labour started my midwife was amazed how low she sat in my pelvis and was confident her position was good. I had spent a lot of my pregnancy looking at the image of the baby in the perfect position for birth so was very happy to hear this!

Things started a few days before the end of the 42nd week; talk of induction was looming large so we were extremely thankful. I started to have mild surges on the Tuesday evening which were easy to manage by focusing my breathing. These continued through the night but I managed to sleep between them and breathe through them. I felt calm but quite exhausted by the time morning came. That day, things felt like they were progressing quickly. Dan was amazing, encouraging me to move around, focus on my breathing, applying counter pressure to my back and getting me drinks and snacks when I needed them. We took a glorious, blustery walk through the park in the late afternoon – the sound of the wind in the trees and watching the leaves moving and glowing in the evening sun was beautiful and very relaxing. I would recommend a walk to anyone in early labour! Feeling the elements is an incredible aid!

When we got home things intensified. A bath helped, but we felt like the surges were getting closer and stronger, and after chatting with the midwife we decided to head to the hospital around midnight, only to be told I hadn’t progressed far enough and that we should go home and wait for this to intensify. This was definitely a blow to us both; we were already exhausted! The next night and day were a blur. I spent my time trying to conserve my energy and manage the surges. I did this very noisily, which came as a bit of a shock as I imagined I would have had a calmer response to the surges. I felt intense pressure in my lower back and sacrum – possibly because of her very low position in the pelvis, or because of a broken back I’d suffered five years before. The only thing that helped was intense counter pressure by Dan. He must have been exhausted!

Finally we got to the birth centre on Thursday evening. I was more tired than I’ve ever been, with no sleep for two nights and intense surges for 36 hours. I was also becoming anxious and tense, and though I was trying hard to relax, I found it very difficult. The adrenalin had kicked in and I was struggling to get back to the relaxed state I’d been in the day before. Despite this, Dan and I remained focused that we wanted a natural birth, in the pool. I am convinced that without our learning through hypnobirthing, I would not have had the strength to stick with this plan. We were assisted by incredible midwives through the night. I must be honest and say that at times I felt very fearful and quite overwhelmed, and I accepted the midwife’s suggestion to use pethidine to help me rest. This was the right decision for me; it reduced my anxiety and exhaustion and combined with the water, helped me come back to my up breathing for around 4 hours through the night. My waters broke at 5, and at about 9 transition began. After a very tough first stage I suddenly felt full of energy and confidence for the second stage. Coached amazingly by Dan, who had throughout the night played our very favourite music – a fundamental anchor that kept me going and gave me strength – I delivered Tilda in the water after about 15 minutes and four surges! I visualised her being with us so clearly that it seemed to make her arrive incredibly quickly! I felt so strong; such a contrast to the first stage.

Unfortunately, seconds after she arrived, the cord snapped and I didn’t meet my baby girl for at least 15 minutes after her birth as they rushed her away for emergency resuscitation and assessment (in fact I didn’t even know she was a girl for at least 5 minutes!). This meant many of our wishes – delayed cord clamping, a natural third stage and of course immediate skin to skin – could not happen. A perfect example of the need to accept that births do not go according to preconceived plans!

In the following five days, Tilda was kept in the special care baby unit. We pushed hard to establish breastfeeding and get as much skin to skin as we could despite the tubes, wires and drips.

We left hospital on day six, with a healthy happy baby exclusively breastfeeding and having put on weight since birth. Hypnobirthing had ensured we were informed and motivated to fight for the best for Tilda despite the bad luck following an otherwise straightforward water birth. For this we are extremely thankful!

Lucy x